How many times have you heard women say “I can do it all by myself. I don’t need any man to help me” or some variation thereof? Especially when it comes to installing head gaskets, shingling a roof and raising children?
Looking For NSA Dating? Try Loveawake:
Drama Free Dating in California
Okay, maybe not often enough when it comes to head gaskets and roofs, but entirely way too much on the children thing. Sure there are many, many things women can do just as well as men, along side them, behind them, in front of them, with them and without them. It has been proven many times.
I know a woman who has essentially struggled most of her adult life. When I say struggle, that is a gross underestimation. She has held down three jobs and still managed to have a hot, home-cooked meal on the table every night. I’m not sure how she does it, raising 6 children on her own. I have only one child and I know at times, that is difficult enough with the help of a husband. She has no doubt shown the world and herself that she is strong, prideful, and capable. But is she necessarily as nurturing as a mother should be?
Yes, she has worked her fingers to the bone to raise her 6 children without the help of a husband. But does that really make her a good mother in her own right? Especially since she is too proud to allow her children’s fathers to pay support because she’s insisted upon ever so resentfully, doing it “all by herself”? By any loser father’s standard, she is a marvel and a luxury. The men who fathered her children were right on the money when they docked their boats into her slip (no pun intended).
You can ask any family court judge and they’ll tell you “it is in the child’s best interest to receive support from both parents”, regardless of how embittered, estranged or insane the said parents may be. This is simply why I can’t regard this woman as anything more than an anomaly, who doesn’t have enough real strength in her to let go of some of her pride and give her kids a chance at a better life. To let their fathers help raise them and give herself a break so she could quit one of her jobs and spend more time with them. I’m sorry but you can’t be “Mother of the Year” while working 3 jobs. But she’ll tell you, unyieldingly, “I raise my own kids, I don’t need anyone’s help”.
She decided long ago, to play the role of the “embittered innocent victim who got accidentally knocked up by a dead-beat loser” and became dead set on taking on the masculine role by being the father, being the sole breadwinner and provider, and being too independent to ever have to rely on anybody for help. When in all actually, she has totally dismissed and balked at being a good nurturer and an exemplary mother because it suits her ego better to spend all her time toiling and sacrificing unnecessarily, “the way any real man would”, as she sees it in her own mind, at least.
She became the man herself, so why in the world would she ever need one?
This kind of mentality has me thoroughly convinced as to why she has also gone from one bad uncommitted relationship to the next. This is the kind of mistake women are making all across the board. They think they are making a profound and authoritative mark on the world by being ultra-competitive with men and being forcefully autonomous with themselves, while at the same time, they are writing in droves on advice columns whining about why they can’t find a man to have a relationship with, let along marry.
They put themselves on a pedestal because of all their accomplishments, be it education, career and earning power, or their ability to juggle being single mothers while working full-time, yet they can’t accomplish having a fulfilling personal relationship.
There’s nothing wrong with being a talented or able woman. But when you assert that you don’t need anyone’s help in a defensive sort of way, especially the help of a man, you’re inadvertently saying, “so there, now leave me alone to do what I am more than capable of doing, by myself.” And that’s exactly how a lot of women are ending up, by themselves.
They’ll proudly declare, “I am a powerful woman and I’m here to prove to everyone and myself that I don’t need anyone’s advice or helping hand because I’m smart and competent enough to figure it out by myself. I’ve done it for myself all these years.”
Makes a man want to run right out and give you everything he has to offer you doesn’t it?
Men want and need to be men and the role of being a man entails taking care of his woman in some capacity. When you strip away a man’s ability to do so, it makes him feel like less than a man, which is the last place he ever wants to be in.
He needs you to need him. He doesn’t want to have to compete with you for what he already inherently and instinctually has to compete with other men to get.He has already vied for you and chose you as his mate. Why the need to keep stacking the cards in your favor?
Men compete with each other for jobs, women, money, housing, and status and when your competitive edge pleases him much less than the idea of getting a root canal, that’s a pretty good indicator that you ought to try a different approach.
Your grandiose sense of self-pride and accomplishment turns him on about as much he likes the idea of you dressing him up in a tutu and ballet slippers and having him perform “Singing in the Rain”.
Make him feel like a man. Try appealing more to his less competitive side by nurturing him. Put away some of your pride, step aside and let him take care of things once in a while and let him know you trust him in his ability to do so.
Encourage him and give him the permission to be supportive in the fact that you earn a living for yourself and value your independence, but make him feel wanted and needed by letting him know you still need and appreciate his help. And above all, never rub it in his face that you’ve done it all on your own, without any anyone’s help, much less his. That is the first thing that’ll guarantee him a one-way ticket out of your life forever.
To be a powerful, strong woman is one thing, but from the perspective in which that power is used by you and perceived by others is often what makes or breaks the deal. Look, no one is asking you to quit your job to become another 1950’s Sara Lee housewife but you don’t have to err on the other side of the extreme by being too self-righteous, cutthroat, and inflexible. Be his ally and seek to offer him the feeling of security of being wanted and needed and he’ll gladly do the same.
Cilj programa je: Upoznavanje sa osobinama i korisnim dejstvima vitamina D, naročito u lečenju pacijenata sa osteoporozom. Razumevanje neophodnosti primene vitamina D u lečenju osteoporoze. Usvajanje smernica o naknadi vitamina D u lečenju pacijenata sa osteoporozom.
